Unwind

I'm home; with my new dining room chairs might I add! They are so beautiful. I'll post a pic in a day or so. Our trip was a lot of fun, very busy though. I saw so many people in such a short amount of time. It makes my head spin to think about it. I got to eat at my favorite fast food place, ZAXBYS! They don't have one where I live, so I always indulge when I go home. Today I will remain consumed with unpacking and organizing my messy house. I'm ashamed to say I left town with my house is horrible condition. As if unpacking alone isn't enough...now i have to add at least 2 hours of house cleaning.

So on my trip I decided to support my dear friend with her workout routine. She has been so dedicated to it that I wanted to be apart of her journey. Wow, what I huge mistake that was. I have never hurt so badly in my life. I told you I was out of shape!!! So I spent 3 days in severe pain. Insanity really did earn it's name in my book. I have so much respect for anyone who can do that. Lol, i guess if I had worked up to it I would have been okay....but I went from nothing to Insanity in a split second. bad idea. It was so precious though, because her 3 yr old [almost] was sitting in there trying to do the moves with us.

My best friend is a massage therapist, she definitely helped me out with a 4 hour massage on Thursday. That was heaven. I got to see her sweet little girl who is now 15 months! (pic above) She is so smart, and so happy all the time. I hate being so far away and not being able to see her grow up. We all spend some quality time together playing Partini, and taking walks, and doing laundry. Anything is fun with a best friend.

All in all it was a wonderful trip. But I still didn't get to see everyone I wanted to, and didn't get to stop in E-city. :( Right now I'm concentrated on how I can get the money to go to Cavalia! It's an awesome show that's going to be in Tampa in March. -another random though- I have managed to stop biting my nails for a week. Weird. I hope I don't start biting them again. It's such a nasty nervous habit. Well, more unpacking to do now.

Too Little Time

My liver hurts. At least that part is over now, Sarah's birthday was a blast though. The Black Eyes Peas rocked out in Charlotte last night. However, the sound at the very top of the arena was bad. Boo for expensive tickets with poor sound quality. I arrived in Rutherfordton and I got to see Seth & Lauren - got to see my husband - got to see my Uncle - got to see my Nanny & Grandaddy too. It's been quite an exhausting day. I just wish I could stay here for another 2 weeks. I'm headed to my other half's house in a bit....I can't wait. I really want to be enthusiastic but I'm so drained I probably will fail at that majorly. I cried my eyes out when my sister left. Gosh we have been so much on the same page it's weird. I feel a lot closer to her now. Such a bitter-sweet day. This is such a boring blog. I'll say something better later.

Trip to Wilmington....

It sure is nice to be back in my home state! I love my sissy. It is her 21st birthday today! [she is sleeping right now...party time when she wakes up] We spend alot of time today, well yesterday I guess you can say, taking pictures. We went downtown & discovered random places. I saw some cool sites! A Key Wall?!!! Not sure what the point of it is, but I intend to find out before I leave town. Tonight we are going to go to the clubs to dance until we pass out. Saturday night we are staying at a rockin' hotel in Charlotte after we to go the Black Eyed Peas concert!. Pics will be posted the morning after. This is going to be a fun loaded weekend. Girl Time has been much needed....I'm feeling girly for the first time in months. Time to sleep now.....this is going to be a great day!! Happy Birthday Sarah!

What a Joke!

I'm exasperated! I'm sure most of you know about Craigslist. More like BS-LIST! Tampa Bay is a huge area with plenty of photographers, so how in the world do you get your name out in a place like this? I started putting up photo shoot for trade adds. To me, it was a way to trade my photography skills in order to acquire things i need in my house. My portfolio is suffering! I haven't had anyone to photograph in a long time. However, I guess everyone on craigslist really has no social life and wants to create a lot of drama instead of trade. Not one person has pulled through and completed the trade they contacted me for. It's slightly upsetting. I just want to practice, i need new stuff for my portfolio. I don't know anyone down here...I don't know how to get my name out. I've sent out emails to a handful of excellent photographers in the area asking if I could help in their studio for FREE just to get some experience and learn. I guess they think its a joke, who in this economy is willing to work for free other than myself? I would feel good about myself if I could help someone out who cant afford a photographer...honestly I wouldn't even need anything in return because the practice is more important to me. *deep breath*

Oh, I think we are going to buy that little place. OK fine, it's a trailer. Wow, I said it. good thing that's over with. I have an issue with the word and what it implies. I think in many people's head trailer = trashy. whatever. It's perfect for our needs in life right now. I'm feeling self conscious right now. Wait, what?!! Why do I even feel that way. I guess I feel like I'll be judged for living in a trailer. Maybe because for too long I've looked at trailers and those who lived in them with judgemental opinions. STUPID narrow minded me. What you live in doesn't reflect who you are. Or even how much money is in your bank account for that matter. [I'm saying all this for my benefit i think] But all in all, I'm thrilled. This is a big step for us. I think if this is what we decide to do that by the end of the week things will be set in motion. We will be moved by April 1st.

The highlight of my day [other than smooching my hubby] was spending almost 6 hours non-stop painting my mom a belated Christmas gift. I guess it can be a Valentines gift as well. It's AWESOME! I'll post a picture once I give it to her. I miss those two girls at the top. I miss home. Can't wait till I get to visit! It's almost 1am. Wow, thats odd. Where did my day go? Good night

Career Searching

I've come to one conclusion thus far in my life, I will never arrive at "grown up". As in the phrase, "When I Grow up I want to be...." I want to be so many things. Photographer, Writer/Author, Nurse...and the list continues. I'm just going to have to pick something I can stick with to make money and something i'll enjoy. I've thrown around the idea in my head of joining the military for years. It has been one of those thoughts I kept coming back to over and over again. Last night my darling husband and I got to talking, yet again, about me joining. We started talking about the different careers within the Coast Guard, one being a PA [Public Affairs Specialist]. Outside of the military that job title could be any of the following: Public Relations, News Reporter, Web Designer, Freelance Writer, Videographer, Professional Photographer, Desktop Publishing Designer. HELLO! My name is all over this. I would acquire the training I needed and be in an environment that would push me to excel. I need a creative job, or at least one that will enable me to be creative eventually. I need structure so I don't slack. I think I'm just going to jump in this both with both feet. Its a win win. I can only become a better photographer with the training and continue to do that on the side. Downside to this option, having to probably wait a year or more before I can get into the program. However at the rate I'm going I will still be aimlessly trying to find a job i like in a year anyways. Going back to college is something I need to do in order to become something, but why should i when i get could get paid to learn the same skills. It may take time to get where I need to go, but I'd get there. This has been an interesting couple days. ----On another note, I think we might be on the verge of purchasing our first place. Not exactly the cute picket fenced house every little girl dreams of, but still our own. It's just a deal I don't think we will pass up. It's going to allow us to save a rediculous about of money for the rest of our tour here in FL. I can live in a place that isnt up to my desired standards right now so that later we can have our perfect dream home. I'm excited and oddly peaceful about all this. Things seem to finally be coming together in ways i never imagined. I'm just praying that God will give us direction.

Three

Clearwater Beach.

This Love of Mine

I met this guy once. I was only 14. Crushed him pretty hard. Kinda got over the crush. Then it was his turn. He did the crushing. Meanwhile, I got hurt *another story*. I did what any heart broken teenage girl would do, took advantage of his limitless kindness. I guess it was flirting. I was too numb to know the difference. So for a long time he was my free meal & a good time when I couldn't handle the pain of being alone. I allowed him to kiss me and hold my hand every now and then. I still remember the taste of that first kiss, an overkill of 3 or more pieces of winterfresh gum. Highschool ended. I left town. I don't remember seeing him much for almost a year. I was busy getting my life screwed up and running in a million and one different directions. I moved back to that small town, and got my first house. Not a week later he shows up. "Let's catch up, breakfast tomorrow". He should have known better, he's not a morning person. Breakfast ended up being dinner. We went to Asheville, some small Thai restaurant. We talked. A LOT more than we ever had before. He got up to use the restroom, and thats the moment I knew something had changed. I didn't go back to eating my dinner as I had so many times before with him...I watched him walk away. Studying his every move. Learning to memorize the way he walked. I don't know if I gave myself away when a huge smile lit up my face when I saw him walking towards me again. I felt so transparent. It felt like he could see into my chest and watch my heart sputter when he smiled back. His eyes had never seemed to blue, so endless. That night we laid in the back of his mom's truck, parked on a hill with nothing but the stars above us. Kissing till the sun came up. We were inseperable from that day on. He moved in and didn't leave until the day he was shipped off to boot camp 2 months later. During those two months we spent every day together, falling in love. Talking about everything under the sun. I followed him when the Coast Guard moved him. I said yes when he got on one knee. It's been 8 months since we were married. I'm still falling in love with him. I've learned more about myself and grown more in the years we have been together than I did wandering around trying to figure out life by myself. He is my perfect other half. He's so patient. So loving. He still looks at me like he did the day he first told me he loved me. There is nothing I have done in this life to deserve a man so wonderful. I'm truely a blessed woman. We are broke, and happy. This Valentines I don't want roses, candy, a nice dinner out, I dont want anything more than being in his arms. And our life is only just beginning together....goodie!


James Lee Abel, you're my whole world.
You are my other half. My better half.
If I had 1000 life times I couldnt give you back what you have given me.
I love you with all the love in my heart.
Thank you for choosing me.